Monday, April 14, 2014

Finding Joy

Writing is fun. It is joyful and therapeutic, inspirational, cathartic, soul-reaching work. When it isn't work.

Writing as a profession can sort of suck. Making it a profession is hard. Blogs that are financially successful, (especially ones where the blogger just writes, no crafts or cooking) are few and far between. Getting a steady, loyal readership is tough. Just ask, I've thought about quitting, but really, if I was in this for the money I would've quit years ago.

One of the best ways to write, and, make money at it, is books. But, that process sucks, too. First, you have to write a book, then edit it, edit some more, then some editing--you get the picture.  Then, you have to find an agent, more editing, then the agent has to find you a publisher. (I made that sound much easier than it is.) I'm still on the editing part.

I recently had someone tell me about their friend's daughter who makes a few thousand a month writing and publishing ebooks. This, of course, got me listening. Then, she said that her friend had never read any of her daughter's books because they were too risque. Heh. That's a nice word for SMUT.

(What do I mean by smut? You know, like 50 Shades of Gross, er, Grey. Not that I've read it. I haven't.)

I could write smut, I'm sure. Come up with some descriptive words for body parts, throw in some heavy breathing and cheesy dialogue. Easy peasy.  I could do it.

I won't.

See, I believe my writing gift is just that, a gift, a heavenly one. It wasn't meant to write suggestive stuff for bored women to pass the time with. I want my writing to bring as much joy to the reader as it does to me. I want to make people laugh and think and realize the possibilities. I want to write about heartache and trial as well as success. I want someone to read it and say, 'That's exactly how I feel. I'm not alone.'

As for my book, I think I'd sort of lost my vision.  It has become this weight around my neck that I drag along as I repeat the mantra, "Must finish, must finish, must finish."  Last week, someone I just met asked me about it, so I explained the concept, then I told her why I started writing it. And, saying the why aloud felt like a rush of fresh air filling my lungs. The weight was lifted. I remembered my purpose. It isn't about making money.

 It's all about joy.

(Photo a Day- A Living Thing)

Tuesday, April 8, 2014

Don't Judge

Tonight, we were reading scriptures. (And don't think we're all perfect and read everyday. We so don't.) It was Hunter's turn. He read a verse that ended with:
"and they shall be driven before like a dumb ass."

Dumb ass.

Giggling ensued. I was not immune. I couldn't help it. Sometimes you have to not take yourself too seriously. Even during scripture time.

Who you calling dumb?

Saturday, April 5, 2014


(I spent the past couple days focusing on thoughts and writing and vulnerability. Instead of a photo, today I decided to write on the prompt.)

I drove myself up the canyon. A winding road twisted among the bare trees, their tips budding with the promise of spring. I walked into a quaint cabin and entered a different world.

Surrounded by women I didn't know, I subconsciously chose a corner, the shyness of my youth washing over me like a wave. I watched conversations and listened to discourse, taking notes on paper and in my mind.

Women approached me, pulling me from behind my self-inflicted wall. Layer by layer my fears and inhibitions were stripped away. As my shell opened, my heart lay exposed. Soft, delicate, it beat in timid rhythm as vulnerability became my badge.

There is no growth without risk. I cannot live and learn unless I let myself become pliable, supple, susceptible to pain. I wrote, I shared, I laughed, I cried. And, then, I cried again. I let my mind follow my open heart, set aside my self-doubt and seized the potential of my future.

Do not fear the softness. There is strength in being vulnerable, in allowing ourselves to risk and try. There is hope in embracing our gifts and in simply being who we are.

“Vulnerability is the only authentic state. Being vulnerable means being open, for wounding, but also for pleasure. Being open to the wounds of life means also being open to the bounty and beauty. Don’t mask or deny your vulnerability: it is your greatest asset. Be vulnerable: quake and shake in your boots with it. the new goodness that is coming to you, in the form of people, situations, and things can only come to you when you are vulnerable, i.e. open.” -Stephen Russell

Thursday, April 3, 2014

Wednesday, April 2, 2014

Photo a Day- SHINE

After a week of snow, even a little sunshine is welcome.

Through the moonroof.

Tuesday, April 1, 2014

Let's Try This Again- Photo-a-Day

This was such a failure when I tried it in February, but I still like the idea. So, I'm trying again. Here's the list-

And here's today's photo.

What's more fun on a snowy spring break than a snow-recliner?

Friday, March 28, 2014

Give Gwyneth a Break

 The internet can be a great place. You can learn a lot of strange and interesting facts.
Like, everyone has a unique tongueprint, like fingerprints.

 You can keep in touch with friends. Facebook anyone???

Or, you can find really cool pictures of stuff you never knew existed.
See this and more.

Today, there's a whole bucketful of talk on the internet about Gwyneth Paltrow. What kind of blogger would I be if I didn't chime in? (Don't answer that!)

Gwyneth got more than an earful for her comments about how her life as an actress and mother is much harder than women who have 'regular jobs' and kids. I know! Shocking, right? Thing is, all Ms. Paltrow has known since being a mother, is being an actress-mother. She has no idea what it's like to have a full-time job and a family. (And, come to think of it, neither do I.) So, she's making statements from what she knows. Because, what else can she draw from? Sure she's an actress, but even playing the role of a working mother (has she ever? not sure) wouldn't truly show her what it's like.

So, maybe we should give her a break.

As for the divorce--divorce sucks, I don't care who you are. I'll admit that I'm a bit cynical when it comes to Hollywood marriages. I've been known to snort when a marriage is announced (I'll give it a year), or to laugh a bit when there's a split (Wow, aren't we all surprised).
But, it doesn't change the fact that two people who were in love and planned to spend their lives together aren't. And, when they have children, even worse. And, I for one would hate to have my marriage failure blasted all over the internet and media for all the world to see and criticize.

It's easy to look at Gwyneth and all her money, and beauty, and fame, and children with odd names, and think-- Well, she has it all. I don't feel bad for her.

But, I do. And, I feel bad for her kids. And, her husband. The world they had is crumbling and even when it's in a fancy house with maids and pools and such, it's still crumbling.

Maybe what we need here on the internet is a little more compassion. And understanding. And forgiveness.

And, if that doesn't work, maybe more cat vines!