frazzled & frumpy

Do you know who Heidi Klum is? I've debated about putting her picture on here. I looked for one, but she's not dressed in most of them. Holy Crap! There's a reason right there for having parental controls on your computer. Just google her name-whoa! Anyway, I really want to hate her. She's had several kids and is still a supermodel. She even did a Victoria's Secret runway show just a few weeks after giving birth. Seriously. When I'm resurrected, I want her body. I know it doesn't work that way, but a girl can dream. I had a conversation with one of my sisters about bodies last week. We were talking about boob jobs. More specifically, how we both want boob jobs. Basically, we were commiserating about our bodies and how nice it'd be to be able to afford plastic surgery. I was reminiscing about a time when I was firm and more perky. (This was a looong time ago.) Then, we got on the subject of tummy tucks- again, something we'd both like to have

Do you know what your first toy was? If you were a girl, good chance it was a baby doll. From our very first concious moments, we are taught to be mothers. We feed, diaper and even pretend to nurse our little plastic children. "Let's play house," was the favorite passtime. I never wanted anything else. We are mothers before we have our children. The very idea of having a baby is like a pregnant thought that grows and develops and changes our feelings about everything, mostly the future. I have a vivid memory of my husband pushing an empty stroller around our apartment when I was pregnant with our first. We were so excited, we couldn't wait to become three. Then, when these little heart-stealers come into our lives, nothing is ever the same. Who knew you could love something so very much? It almost breaks your heart to feel so many things all at once. Everything they do is amazing. Every smile, coo and burp is a celebration. They grow and so does your love for

"Children sleeping, snow is softly falling Dreams are calling like bells in the distance We were dreamers not so long ago But one by one we all had to grow up When it seems the magic's slipped away We find it all again on Christmas day" I'm sitting here at 6am on January 3 with the Christmas lights on the tree and listening to carols. I guess you could say I'm resisting. I'm not ready for it to be over. Sheesh. You'd think I was 8 years old again. I remember being a kid and feeling such a let-down on the 26th. Even though I'd received gifts, something about it all being over was a bit depressing. That doesn't usually happen now. Quite the opposite. With all the preparation and busy-ness of the holiday season, I'm normally happy to have it over with. The tree comes down and the decorations are put away by now. I've been pondering the change this year. There are lots of possibilities. The feeling that comes with Christmas is something that