Hi Jewels! I awarded you with "The Most Versatile Blogger Award" over at my blog The Greener Bean. I totally don't expect you to participate if it's not your thing -- I just wanted to say thank you for stopping by during NaBloPoMo!
I was looking at the pictures on my laptop, searching for some whimsical or thoughtful picture to post for Wordless Wednesday. What I found was this- Perhaps it's time for a 12 Step Program.
The last few months, every time I thought about my birthday, I thought about turning 55. Then, one day I realized–I AM 55. What? I’ve never minded my age, never feared getting older. But this whole nope-you’re-already-55-you’ll-be-56 has thrown me for a loop. So, what does one do when they feel like they’ve lost a year? How do you celebrate a birthday? What do you do with this year? I’ve pondered this during the last week, wondering about goals or a theme word for the year. Then, while mindlessly scrolling Instagram reels I saw a clip from an interview with Brene Brown and Oprah. Brene was talking about vulnerability and joy. She told a story about a man who said he was always afraid of the joy-filled moments because he was waiting for something bad to happen. So, he stayed ‘in the middle’, never being too joyful so that if something bad happened, he was ready. If something good happened, it was a nice surprise. Then, in his 60’s he and his wife were in an accident and his wife was
Her house is stifling. The fan above her clicks a rhythm and she lays as still as she can, hoping for relief. She pushes herself up, forcing movement that reverberates in her head. Walking through the rooms, she checks windows, praying for the breath of a breeze. She loves this house. Here she nursed and nurtured her babies. The walls show signs of life-- fingerprints and smudges. Smiling faces, captured and framed, adorn the walls. But, the walls are closing in and she retreats to the sanctuary of her room. The thoughts are pressing, intensifying the pain in her head. She tries with all her might to force them out. You're not welcome here . Still, they come. Persistent, they are. The fan beats in time with the judgements- ' not e-nough, not e-nough, not e-nough'. She puts out the welcome mat, hoping for sleep. Instead, she cries, curled into herself. But, the day is like any other, demanding, not to be ignored. Amazing how you can function when you
It's always so hard to come back to reality after a nice getaway. Here's hoping your return to the here and now will be a gentle one ;)
ReplyDeletecoming back is hard at first
ReplyDeletethen my feet tend to quicken
as i approach those left behind
Leaving behind hot tubs AND naps?!
ReplyDeleteI hope there was chocolate at home to compensate. ;)
Welcome back! I trust you didn't miss us like we missed you. ;)
ReplyDeleteNo phone or children? Happy Holidays to you too! lol
ReplyDeleteHi Jewels! I awarded you with "The Most Versatile Blogger Award" over at my blog The Greener Bean. I totally don't expect you to participate if it's not your thing -- I just wanted to say thank you for stopping by during NaBloPoMo!
ReplyDeleteSo glad you had a good break! Thank you for stopping by the blog.
ReplyDeleteGlad you got to take a break!
ReplyDelete