|My girls. |
This picture has nothing to do
with this post, it just makes me happy.
This is the first of two thoughts that have been mulling in my mind. Let me tell you, I've been force feeding that baby for the last few days. I've sort of reveled in my depression, holding tight to it, using it as an excuse for letting the laundry pile up and ignoring people. While my situation hasn't really improved, I've decided I need to 'snap out of it' and get on with living.
One of the reasons for my decision is the second thought that my brain has been tossing around. It's one that I heard years ago at an Education Week seminar. It was given by Richard and Linda Eyre, two very knowledgeable and wise teachers. They said that when something bad happens, or we feel depressed, we go on a downward spiral, and that we have to reach the bottom of that spiral before we can start working our way back up. If we get stopped in the middle of the spiral by someone trying to get us out, we may feel a bit better for a while, but we will have to continue that downward turn until we actually reach bottom.
Today, I hit bottom.
I feel awful for the neighbor who came over. She was offering help, and I'm sure, had no idea the blubbering mess I would become. Seriously, I was a freak. I cried. I wiped my nose, tucked my hair behind my ear, looked away, and then repeated the process, all while nervously shaking a leg. Holy Crap! I'm surprised she didn't turn and run out the door. She's an older woman and so very kind. She listened and encouraged me and even gave me a hug. After she left, I shuddered when I realized how I behaved.
But, after a bit more of the crying (alone this time) I pulled myself together. I've cleaned my room, organized the bills (which I've been avoiding) and even put on a bra. The laundry isn't done, but I'm working on it.
And, I'm here.
Thank you for all the encouraging comments and for not giving up on me. I have the best friends ever.
Tomorrow, an announcement. Not a big surprise, if you know about November, but, still.
Have a great Monday.
(To any friends in the path of Sandy, my thoughts and prayers are with you. Be safe.)