Saturday, December 22, 2012

Tips # 3-5, Just in Time

(And now, back to our regularly scheduled programming.)


I know, you've been waiting impatiently for my last three tips. 'Christmas is almost upon us, Queen Jewels, we must know how to get through.' Not to worry, I've got your back.

Tip #3-  Decorating

Now, if you think it's too close to the big day, you've already got all your decorating done. Fine. See ya later. Thing is, there's always room for improvement, must be a shelf or doorway somewhere that could use a little more cheer.

But, last minute decorating can be a challenge.  The key is to use what you already have. For example, want that 'snow' look under your nativity or sleigh?  You do not need that expensive stuff they sell in stores.  Toilet paper, people.  It's white, and fluffy.  Layer a few sheets and voila! Your display has that fresh snowfall look. And, it's so handy when your little one has a cold.

As for the tree, the homemade look is totally in this year.  And, the thing that will give that look better than anything else is a popcorn garland.  Thing is, popcorn garlands take a. lot. of. work. Sticking a threaded needle through hundreds of kernels is just more work than the queen has time for.  The solution? Pop yourself a big bowl, then just chuck it at the tree.  It'll stick in those branches and you'll have the homey look. Your kids can even help. Heck, put them in charge.  Just be sure they know how to use the vacuum.

Tip #4- Fashion

This is a big one, what with the Christmas Eve and Christmas parties in the next couple days.  I have a couple rules for how to dress for Christmas success.
The biggest thing to consider is whose house you're going to.  If it's your family, you know, your sisters and brothers who've seen you since you were knee-high to an elf, casual is the way to go.  You can try to dress cute to impress them, but seriously?  They've seen you when you tumbled out of bed in the middle of the night with the stomach flu.  Just accept it and be comfortable. Sweats and a t-shirt are fine.

But, if the party is at your in-laws, you have to think differently. Especially if she is going to be there. She is your husband's brother's wife.  The one who has been making snide comments about your kids since they were babies- ("Is he still on the bottle?" Yeah, like her degenerate kids turned out so well.)  If she'll be there, then you have to dress one step up.  Just enough that when she sees you, she'll think, "Dang! Should've worn the good jeans." And, you can give her a snickering smile when you compliment her Christmas sweater. Whatever you do, do not show up in a denim jumper with black leggings and red socks over ankle boots.
What? You're taking fashion advice from someone with the word 'frumpy' in the title.

Tip # 5- Relax

This is the most important one. It's Christmas. Enjoy it.  As women, we tend to do for everyone else.  Let someone do for you.  Show them a Christmas movie, like Scrooged, and tell them that the only way to keep from being an old miser is to serve others. Then hand them some lotion and your feet.  If you have enough kids, make them rub your shoulders, too. (See, there's a reason for having so many!)  Send the hubs to get you an icy diet Coke and relax. You've earned it.




5 comments:

  1. Ha ha! I love all your tips! I had to go back a few posts because things have been so crazy for me this past week. I've said it before (I think) and I'll say it again: I love your blog!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Getting out a package of Charmin now & putting a bag of microwave popcorn in for some chucking.

    Best advice ever.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I haven't been here in a while -- too busy. I'm getting sick of that phrase too, trying to figure out how to not have to say it. This post made me laugh, so much that Philip even noticed I was smiling for once in .... well a long time.:) Thanks Julie! Love you girl!

    ReplyDelete
  4. I just took everything off the tree today (hey, I know it's late, but we didn't even get it UP until the 21st and not decorated til the 23rd--yay me), but I really feel bad that I missed the popcorn advice. If you used the theater butter along with the butter-flavored PAM on the floors, you'll really be able to pass those supermarket cookies off as your own. ;)

    ReplyDelete
  5. Dang, the perils of being so busy over the Christmas period...I missed all this fabulous advice!

    ReplyDelete

Are you one of the three? Stand up and be counted!