frazzled & frumpy

I'm an optimist. Hope is always out there and I'm on a quest to find it.  This condition is what got my husband and I involved in a multi-level marketing scheme years ago.  We were presented with just that- hope.  Hope not only for a better life, but a MUCH better life. I wanted so badly to give my kids a great life,  I took it in, hook, line and sinker.  We stayed in for a few years, attending meetings and conventions, buying products and the idea that it was all going to make us rich.  After throwing our money at the dream for so long, we finally accepted the fact that it wasn't going to happen.  We quit in pretty much the same situation as when we'd joined.  Broke. Strangely, this experience didn't diminish my optimism.  I still search for the silver lining, no matter how thin or hidden it may be.  Without hope, life is meaningless. The Handy Man and I have been married for almost 20 years.  During the last sixteen, he's had the same job, though a job doe

Wanna give your kids a good Halloween scare?  Show them your yearbook photo. Mwaa-ha-ha-ha. Happy Halloween!

What happens when my stress level  is at an all-time high, and,  I'm having a really crappy day, and,  it's only 11am? This- Yes, it's almost gone. Yes, I drank it. And, yes, I do feel better. Thank you.

The Handy Man and I don't always agree. Shocking, I know.  When we were engaged, I thought this would never happen.  We were young and in love and hormonal.  We liked the same movies, loved Mexican food and both wanted a big family.  Compromise? It just wouldn't be necessary. hehehe. Isn't it funny the things we learn? For example- my husband hates Halloween. Hates. It.  It's a pagan holiday, he claims. Well, I grew up celebrating Halloween every year.  I remember fondly the Snow White costume, with its plastic mask with teeny-tiny holes for the eyes and nose,  and its highly flammable plastic dress.  I looked awesome!  One year, my mom made me a princess costume and several years, I was a hobo. (I'm sure my kids don't even know what that is.)  But, amid all the memories, not once did I get into any pagan worship. Unless you include the worship of chocolate, of that I am guilty. Still. If  my husband had his way, our kids wouldn't have gone trick-or-tr

Blogging is a phenomenon.  It's amazing when you start looking around and find out just how many people are doing it. But, why?  Why do we blog? Last night, the Handy Man and I were at Lagoon, a local amusement park.  While standing in line for the old roller coaster, I overheard a young man behind us talking to his date. "I don't get the big deal about swear words."  Trying to impress, or make excuses for his language? "I mean, it's a word.  If it was in another language, you wouldn't even understand it. It's just a word." Just a word? Is there any such thing? And therein lies my answer.  We blog because Words. Have. Power. Poetry and music.  A letter from home.  A speech.  Words wield power that lasts through the ages.  "I have a dream."  "Give me liberty or give me death."   "I am the light of the world." None could argue that there is a possibility for our words to live long after the hour in which t

The silver can calls to me. A bead of condensation breaks free and rolls down the side.  Chhhshhhhhh.  I watch my sister drink the ice cold soda and my throat feels parched.  The glass of water sitting in front of me looks tasteless and dull. sigh. I love diet Coke.  It's a part of my day. Everyday.  I get a sense of comfort seeing the 12 pack in the fridge.  I look forward to that first taste.  A 44 ounce from the corner gas station is my favorite treat. Was. I broke up with diet Coke 4 days ago.  I know, I know.   I've done it before.  I always go back.  But, this time I mean it. Maybe. 21 days. That's my goal.  They say (who are 'they' anyway?) that it takes 21 days to make or break a habit.  21 days just might break me.  It's just soda, right?  Problem is, it's everywhere . In the grocery store when I check out, my arm automatically reaches for the cooler door. Oops. Grit my teeth and pay without that cold bottle in my hand. At the gas stat

Okay, so here's a quick Survivor update because I've been a slacker and didn't post and it's on again tonight. (Could that sentence be any longer?) A couple things happened two weeks ago that were significant.  First, they got their swim suits  Yay! No more bras and panties, wait, their bikinis are just as skimpy.  But, here's Dawn in the cutest modest swim suit. Seriously, so cute. And, she says in her 'confession' time that she's feeling like the older contestant. Who cares? Woman, you are doing a great job! But, because of that feeling, she thought she needed to exert her strength. So, when the challenge came around, there she was. The challenge was 2 men and 1 woman from each tribe.  They each had a long stick/bar over their shoulders, then one at a time, the other team would determine who got weight added- 20 lbs. at a time. First of all, just standing with the big stick on my shoulders would've done me in.  "Hey, Jeff, can I have a chair?

“Ye are the Children of light , And the children of the day ; We are not of the night , Nor of darkness .” 1 Thessalonians 5:5 A few years ago, my daughter, Sadie, had a best friend.  Anna was a little wisp of a girl, with big eyes and pale blond hair.  The two were inseparable. Though they shared many things, mostly their love of animals, their home lives were very different. I got to know Anna's mother, Beth, because of our daughter's friendship.  I wouldn't say we were close, but we were friends.  A hard life and tough decisions had taken their tole on Beth.  Though younger than me, she looked older.  She was missing a couple teeth, and the others were yellowed from years of smoking.  Lines creased her face and her hair was thin.  We were opposites, but I liked her.  I remember well the day she told me they were losing their house.  She had such a sadness in her eyes.  It broke my heart.  A week later, Sadie spent the day with Anna as they packed the movin

(Image from vectorvaco.com) Our days are made up of decisions.  One at a time.  Many of them last about as long as the cookie we eat or the TV show we watch.  Others are cumulative and  reach their tentacles out to touch our future.  We often don’t realize it at the time, because we’re all near-sighted when it comes to our vision of the future.  There are no magic glasses for us to wear as we choose each day. For the most part, I don’t look back on my life with regret.   I hate when someone is asked, “If you could do it all again, what would you change.” Because, well, you can’t.   And if you could, you’d make the same choices and mistakes as the first time around, because,    you’re you.   My major decisions, who I married, my children (even the unexpected ones),   where we live, I’m happy with them all.   I wouldn’t change a thing. Well, one thing. Friday night we went to Odyssey Dance Theater’s production, “Thriller”.   (If you live in Utah and ever have the chance to go- GO

My oldest and my youngest spending the day together. My (now) organized pantry. The Werewolf  prowling around our house.

Applications and forms. This is the life of a mom. Between schools, doctor's offices and scouts, it seems I'm always filling something out.  I dread it when I get to that one line- Occupation :_______________ I never know what to put. I hate the word 'homemaker'.  I can put 'stay-at-home-mom' but that's not really true. I've never received a paycheck for my duties at home. I know, I know, I get paid in blessings. What. Ever. I'm pretty sure that's not what they mean.  My husband works and I spend his money, so I sort of get paid. But, for what?  I don't think 'call girl' would look very good on the elementary school's paperwork.  I could write this, Occupation :  nothing, thanks for the stab at my self-esteem. Instead, I've started skipping it.  I mean, really, why do they need to know? If I'm a lazy woman who sits home all day, that's my business. I like being home with my kids, I don't want a 'j

I love thrift stores! It's become a bit of an addiction for me. Finding great deals,the thrill of the hunt. Love. It.  Whenever I get a new purse, my sister's response is, "Did you get that at DI?" (Too bad I can't type in sarcasm.)  I will admit that I have a problem with purses. They attract me like a drug. I can rationalize it because I do buy them at DI (Deseret Industries) and they never cost more than $5.   Since I spend so much time at DI and Savers, I thought I'd share a few tips. DI tends to have better prices, but Savers has more inventory. Also, DI doesn't have sales. Every Monday, one of the price tag colors at Savers is 99 cents.  All week, one other color is 1/2 off. Always go with an open mind. You might find exactly what you're looking for, but more often, you'll find something else you just can't live without. When buying purses, check the inside to see how clean it is. And smell it. Nothing worse than buying a purse that sm

I missed the last couple weeks of Survivor updates, so here's the condensed version- plus some contestant intros.  The second person voted out was Christine. She pretty much sealed her fate on day one when she offended Coach. (He's a returning player, placed in the  game to cause drama.  It worked, he's so annoying.) Don't feel too bad. This picture is deceiving.  This is how she looked at tribal council... She's very outspoken, which can be good in this game, or as in her case, very bad.  I was ready for her to go after tribal council. Mainly because in that 15 minutes, she rolled her eyes more than my teenagers do in a week. Next was the guy who called himself Papa Bear. He was nice.  His downfall was his age and fitness level. He didn't do well in the challenge and his tribe gave him the boot. The age thing is why I worry for Dawn and Rick , tho' Dawn kicked butt at the challenges. If she keeps that up, she'll last longer. Rick is the strong s

A few weeks ago I was pondering the recent events in my life.  No one gets through without trials and I'm no exception.  But, even with the difficulties, I have had several things happen to me that helped me see how 'watched over' I am. Over the past few months,  I received emails, and had a couple of conversations that were so perfectly timed that I cannot call them chance.  The Lord's hand may be unseen and even unrecognized, but it is there.  Coincidence? I don't believe in it.  What I do believe is that we have a Father in Heaven who loves us and is so completely aware of us that He knows what we need before we do. This assurance was reinforced at the  Relief Society Broadcast a week ago. President Uchtdorf's talk was, in a word, incredible.  I  don't think a single woman listening wouldn't have been touched by his message.  And, will any of us look at a forget-me-not the same way again? The three things that hit me most were- Be patient with yo